burning out as a caregiver
Are you the primary caregiver for a loved one? Perhaps your schedule is filled with doctor’s appointments or you’re busy attending to the basic needs of your loved ones that you often find yourself fulfilling other responsibilities only when you get time for yourself.
Some feel resentment for having all the load on their shoulders and feel exasperated that help does not seem to be available to them. 😔
In this blog I’ll share the signs of caregiver burnout (which is not exhaustive) and the ways to cope with them in the short term. Like all issues, if the red flags persist, getting help from a reliable, trusted person or from a professional is the way to go.
First of all, it is not easy. Let me 👏 commend you (your heart and intention) 👏 for being there for the person who needs you even if they’ve not shared their appreciation. As I’ve mentioned in the paragraphs above, placing another person’s need before yourself can often be a draining process if you’re not taking care of yourself in the process.
While we are fulfilling our duties to our loved ones and cherishing every precious moment we have with them, it is imperative to know that we cannot do this at the expense of our mental and physical wellbeing.
👀 Here are some signs of caregiver burnout:
You are constantly tired
Easily feel irritable
Losing patience with others and yourself
Questioning if ‘taking care of another person’ is really your purpose in life
Wondering why others are not helping
Feeling resentment for the person who needs your help
Then feeling guilty for bearing that resentment
The list goes on, but if you’re feeling like you no longer recognise the person you’re becoming because you’ve been living FOR others, this is the time to take a pause and reassess.
You could pen your thoughts down in a journal, or speak to a supportive friend. The crucial thing to do now is sit with your thoughts and unpack them. Feel the feelings that are rising, and guide yourself out of the negative thoughts and feelings you have.
💓 How to cope now
You’re a responsible person and like all responsible people you will want to make sure that the person you’re taking care of is in safe hands before you ‘take time for yourself’ - I understand. (if you’re about to roll your eyes and think “how selfish of me”, STOP that thought right there).
Could there be a friend or a family member who could stand in for a short time and allow you some time to unwind perhaps in your room or somewhere in nature?
If it’s not possible, which I can relate to, do the unpacking after your loved one is asleep.
There’s magic happening at night or early morning, when the world is quiet and you are by yourself.
💭 Think about:
The person you were before the responsibility of being a caregiver
The person you are now with all the responsibilities you have
The person you would like to be apart from the responsibilities
How you can ask for help - perhaps delegate small tasks, hire a part timer, speak to professional who can give you tips on how to manage the person you’re taking care of
What you would love to do, experience, learn *outside* of this role as a caregiver
The nonnegotiable habits you need to incorporate right away to stay physically and mentally fit amidst the stress your body is taking in (simple 5 mins routine can do wonders - because your body and mind knows you’re intentionally taking care of yourself). You know I always say: baby steps!
Some free resources I have that you can access right away:
Newsletter subscription (weekly emails of encouragement and dose of mental health tips)
🚩Red flags showing you need professional help asap:
Wanting to give up on life
Thinking that the situation is hopeless
Believing that help will never be available to you
Wondering when this will all end
I too am a caregiver and so we are in the same boat. I need you to believe that there is a way out, and the way out is surrounding yourself with people who will encourage and uplift you. There is more to life than giving up. You are made for great things. This might be a phase to build your character, but your life will not be “pathetic” or filled with suffering for the long term. I believe in this for you and I truly hope you believe in the same for yourself too. 🍀
If you’d like to dive deeper into seeking professional help for your mental wellness, I’m opening up my books for 1:1 Rapid Transformational Therapy (RTT) sessions. RTT can help you understand and overcome unhelpful, critical thought patterns that contribute to overall stress.
By communicating directly with your subconscious mind, you can discover what’s truly draining your energy and empower yourself to choose different thoughts and actions. By changing your focus and thoughts you can change the outcomes in your life.
I've assisted many people, like you, in making significant life changes in order to feel whole, complete and satisfied with the person you’re becoming. Get in touch with me here if you're ready to make changes in your life and get EVERYTHING you need to live the life you desire (because it IS available to you) ➡️ https://emergedbutterfly.com/application
Since you’re here, be sure to subscribe to our email list and be part of the EB Tribe. You’ll get instant access to a powerful training guide that I created to help you release the critical, judgmental thoughts in your mind 📩. You’ll also get exclusive content, some special love notes, and personal updates from me that I simply don't share anywhere else 🤫
