Want To Be Free Of Jealousy? Do This!

In the shadowy corners of our minds, there's a strong feeling called jealousy, a force that we've all grappled with at some point. It's that uneasy sensation when you see your partner's phone ring, making you suspicious and worried. 💔 But what is this feeling, and why does it affect us so much?

“In jealousy there is more self-love than love.”
- Francois De La Rochefoucauld

Jealousy isn’t all bad! In fact, in its mild form, it can be a sign that we deeply care. It's natural to want to be the center of our partner's world, to have their attention and commitment. These expectations are healthy benchmarks in any relationship. Mild jealousy can indicate our investment in the relationship, our fear of losing someone special.

But here’s the thing – jealousy becomes problematic when it spirals out of control. Constant fights or invading your partner's privacy? Not healthy. So, how do we deal with it? 🤔

“The jealous are troublesome to others, but torment to themselves.”
- William Penn

How to trust your partner fully and not feel jealous 

1. Be transparent about your needs, have clear communication & expectations 🗣️

It is easy to land in arguments or upsets when a partner gets jealous while another partner is clueless about his/ her own behavior. Be clear with your partner on the behaviors you accept and the behaviors you wish they refrain from conducting. 

Honestly share your triggers and work together to come up with various ways to address the triggers. For example if you feel uncomfortable having your partner express physical gestures towards a colleague/ friend, clearly articulate your discomfort with them privately and have them understand that you’re not being controlling but you simply dislike their gesture and would prefer them to interact in another way. 

• What are some ways you can signal to your partner when you’re feeling triggered or upset? Come up with ways to give each other space to calm down and come up with ways to reconcile with each other. 

• Understand yours and your partner’s desires, wants and needs from the relationship and know that while you’re not dependent on each other for happiness, respect is needed for a lasting healthy relationship. Respect towards your partner, respect towards your relationship - to do what’s best for the relationship. 

2. Explore the triggers 🧐

What’s running below the surface of jealousy - it might be feelings of insecurity, it might be feelings of abandonment, it might be feelings of not being on par to another when a person feels jealous. Seek help from a professional and find the root cause of feeling “jealous”. Knowing the root reason for feeling jealous can help you understand yourself better and know that the current situation is not what’s hurting you but instead an interpretation of a past event is affecting how you feel in the present. 

Relationships are a beautiful dance between two individuals. They require effort, understanding, and sometimes, a little help. 🤝 If you've tried various methods to overcome jealousy and still find yourself struggling, consider reaching out to a qualified therapist. 

Often, relentless jealousy can be a sign of past wounds, haunting our present and clouding our judgment. With the help of a 1:1 RTT session with me, you can work through old scars, freeing your mind and heart from the shackles of the past. By addressing the root causes, you can create space for healthier, more fulfilling relationships.

If you're reading this and feeling the weight of jealousy, know that there's a path to healing. Don't hesitate to seek the support you need. Reach out, talk to someone, and take that step toward a more emotionally balanced life.

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